Dear merciful literary muses, I have to read Snooki's new book...

I know, I know... there's far better things for me to read. Like the phonebook. Or the directions to my local insane asylum. However, from the excerpts I've read on the internet (like this one here) I've come to the conclusion that I must read this & poke fun at it.

If someone posts later that I've clawed my own eyes out & can never post again, this is probably the reason why.